Why is it that there is so much angst with motherhood?
My thoughts and concerns with where I should be and what I should be doing with regards to my children and my family is ever changing.
On the one hand I know that I need an education and that it is a good thing. I know that I need a degree to fall back on in case something happens but how quickly do i need to do it? This semester I am taking a full load of classes. On the other hand I know I need to be, and I would much rather be, spending my time doing things with and for my family. Should i just do one class at a time so that I can make sure that my children have all my attention on them?? There is so much that needs to be done to ensure a family runs smoothly and that each person has what they need physically, emotionally,spiritually,etc...
I love being a stay at home mom and I plan on doing it forever with no regrets!! So is it necessary to even have a degree in mind or is it just as good to just gain knowledge and maybe make sure that life insurance is taken care of and savings is there so ensure I am prepared FINANCIALLY just in case. Whats funny is that I talk to Kelley about it and he says "i hope you don't want me to agree or disagree because that puts me in a really bad situation... I don't want to be responsible for that decision"
UGH!! what a dilemma! Do I achieve a goal of getting a degree,which is just something that I want?? or do I do what I am supposed to do and be a mommy first and foremost???
4 comments:
Oh Jen, Motherhood is FULL of angst, guilt and regret. But its also full of love, happiness, and pure joy. I am forever trying to find the right balance. It seems impossible to know what NEEDS to be done, what you WANT to do , and wht you SHOULD do. That is such a hard choice when both things are good. Pray plenty and read the talk from a few conferences ago about good, better and best. Maybe reading it will help you come to a decision, maybe not. Good luck figuring it out!
What is best for you and only known by you and Lord. It is hard. But I know a friend of my who lives in the snow who always gives me great advice having older kids and all. The answer is in you, you just got to find it! Love you.
Okay, so I finally got caught up on all your older posts. Did I ever tell you I had the same issue as Madylyn in high school. I kept passing out for no reason. (well, the reason they came up with was stress and LACK OF SLEEP!) It's just how my body communicated with me. Weird. I didn't necesarrily get over it, but my body did find new ways to demonstrate stress....MIGRAINES> another thing she and I have in common. Sorry about the mom stress. I know we all have it. I don't have a good answer. It's something I struggle with too. Hang in there!
You guys are all amazing!!! Thank you so much for the advice! After much thought and prayer this will be my last full semester. I will just take one class at a time and eventually gain the knowledge I need for that degree I want. My kiddos do need me now more than ever and so does my family. So I will be a full time stay at home wife and mommy and enjoy every second of it!! You guys are awesome!!!
Post a Comment